New Hip

My Dad came through his hip replacement surgery this morning! I talked with him on the phone, and he was groggy but coherent. I'm sad that he has to experience more pain as the result of July's car accident, but am hopeful that he'll gain more mobility, and less pain eventually. Fortunately, my mom is with him for two weeks. She is staying at a hotel in San Francisco about a mile from the hospital. I wish I could be there, too.

I can't think too much about the teenagers that were driving drunk without a license (or insurance) when they hit my Dad and Jacob. It angers me that there is no justice or compensation. Dad had to hire a lawyer just to retrieve his own insurance money, and the lawyer took a third of it. What an unjust world, but what can we do? We won't be getting rid of cars just yet. I wonder what will happen with transportation and peak oil in my lifetime.

So much is out of my control. I have to focus on the good that came out of this incident. Karl received more help and support from county welfare agencies, which in turn relieved my parents of his full time care. This has been positive for all of them.

It's hard to be so far from home. I miss my family and friends. I miss the sun, the beach, the redwoods. I don't like being so far away.

Knits Around

Check out these one of a kind, hand knitted purses by Bernadette at
www.KnitsAround.com
Wish I had her mad knitting skills!

Overheard today at the Squirrel Hill Library:

Small boy gazes adoringly at his mother, says: Mommy is Andy's friend!
(Mother picks up an armful of books.)
Small boy: Mommy is strong!

If that doesn't melt a passerby's heart, then it must be made of stone.


Andy with little friend Elise

Our 100th Post

The snow in this picture will most likely be gone by tomorrow, or Thursday. We're thawing here in Pittsburgh. Great chunks of snow and ice fall from the rooftops with a crashing roar; Andy says it sounds like thunder. These rolling bursts of "thunder" kept me awake last night!

Andy enjoys the slushy puddles that flood the street. The changing season never fails to delight him. Me... not so much. Now that we're warming up (a high of 50 today), I hope a change in my mood will soon follow!

Here's an update on our morning routine with Andy. In a previous post, I complained about his screams of resistance to leaving the house in the morning. We had a rough patch there for awhile, followed by a short period of playful cooperation. Now he's hit another stage: verbal negotiation power to stall our departure. Instead of physically arching his back, he plays an "artful dodge."

A typical morning:
Me: It's time to get ready for school!
Andy: Just three minutes later.
Me: OK, in three minutes it will be time to get ready for school.
Me, one minute later: Let's take off your pajamas.
Andy: NO! Pajamas cozy.
Me, starting to unzip the PJ's: Ooohh, I see a wet diaper.
Andy: No wet! Just dry!
Me, removing diaper: Yes, a dry diaper will feel so much better.
Andy: I'm running away! (Runs naked in circles)
Me: Don't you want to see your friends today at school? You need to get dressed!
Andy: No friends! Friends scary! Friends naughty!
Me: You like playing with Miles, Emily and James.
Andy: No friends! Friends run away!
Me: What about teacher Leigh?
Andy: School is scary. Just stay at Andy's house.

Needless to say, once we arrive at "school", he runs right to his favorite toys without so much as a backward glance. If he cried or seemed upset at drop off time, I might believe him that school was "scary". Transitions are the challenge.

Happy Valentine's Day

Yesterday was Andy's first V-day party at his school. He enjoyed a face full of frosting, and candy hearts galore. I simply couldn't put a stop to the sweets. There were too many and he was having too much fun, so I gave up policing and grabbed a cupcake myself.

Today we had planned a party for our Moms Club at the Center for Creative Play, but had to cancel. The Center was closed, along with 581 schools in the area, due to icy road conditions. Canceling the party was a disappointment, but since the roads were empty, Andy was able to tobaggon down our street with a neighbor! And the trees make beautiful icicles.

Brrrr

So, Andy had his first "snow day". His preschool teacher called to cancel because of the wind chill, which makes the temperature feel about 11 below, even though it's only -1. At least that's what Accuweather.com tells me.

Cassandra says she forgets what these temperatures feel like, even though she spent several winters in Chicago. To refresh her memory, here's my best description: when the wind is whipping your face with a sting that brings tears to your eyes, climbing into your frozen car feels like stepping into a warm sauna. It's that %$#@ing cold.

And yet, two of my friends here, one from Iowa and the other from Minnesota, tell me this is really nothing. I'll take their word for it, those two who save their bitching for more important matters, like potty training. ("Are you done whining about the cold now, because I want to tell you how my daughter left a turd for me on the stairs.")

Now you know why I like the gal from Iowa, because she drops words like "turd" into the conversation without a shred of embarrassment. The Minnesotan woman, her speech is less colorful, but I love the things she gets me to think about. Although I'd heard of the Montessori Method of education, her enthusiasm for it inspired me to learn more. Mike and I both read up on Montessori, and are now convinced this approach meshes with our own ideals, and seems to be an environment Andy would thrive in.

It's a shame that the local Montessori public charter can only espouse a small part of the philosophy. They claim to be 30% Montessori. Sadly, the system of grades and high stakes testing is incompatible with the crux of Montessori: that of the child's individuality and freedom.

It's Groundhog Day!

On Gobbler's Knob I see no shadow today.
I predict that early spring is on the way.

Andy and I hadn't heard Punxutawney Phil's prediction when we decided to head out to the Pittsburgh Zoo this morning, but we were right in feeling a celebratory mood. Temperatures hovered just below freezing today. An early spring!?

I suppose Pennsylvania could have treated me much worse in my first winter here, but these past two weeks have been cold enough. Oh, sure, the first few days of snow were enchanting. I was on a Lake Tahoe vacation! I would have been whistling "Walking in a Winter Wonderland", (if I could whistle). As it was, the song danced around my head as I drew Andy repeatedly to the window. "Look, son! Look at all the pretty snow!"

Soon, my mantra became: "Still snowing?"

Or: "The snow... It's still here? Cold, eh."

Then, it started to feel chilly even looking out the window. Our windows are drafty, that's part of the problem, but it actually became painful just to turn my eyes and gaze at the leftover, crusty, sludgy snow-stuff (never mind slipping and sliding and driving in it)... That's when I started missing California.

But, the zoo. Back to the zoo. Andy and I enjoy the zoo most at this time of year. We have it mostly to ourselves, and some of the animals are so active, it seems as though they put on a private show for us. Nothing risque, just a little more frolic and joy in their step. The tiger cubs and polar bears especially thrive in this weather, and seem to like the break from constant surveillance. They can let their fur down.

Still referring to himself in the third person, Andy expressed his desire to have a more hands-on experience with the animals: "Andy hug the Polar Bear. Andy pet the polar bear on the back, gently," To which, I replied: "The polar bears are wild animals, and don't like to be pet or hugged. They have sharp claws. They are in a special cage."

But, my heart did little leaps when Andy, defying all logic, attributed the powers of the gods to me, his mother: "Mommy take the polar bear out of the cage. Mommy take it out. Mommy let Andy hug the bear, gently. No hurt you."

Ahhhh, 'if I could, if I only could... I surely would.'